The Commercial-News, Danville, IL

October 18, 2013

Vernon B. Fonner


The Commercial-News

---- — Vernon B. Fonner died at Carle Foundation Hospital on Oct. 14, 2013, as a result of a car accident on Sept. 23, 2013.

He was born Oct. 18, 1953, in Danville. He was preceded in death by his parents, Charlotte and Edwin Fonner.

His sister, Sally Fonner, and brother, Chuck Fonner, survive.

Vernon worked with his parents at Fonner’s Dry Cleaning, and helped establish Leisure Time Estates and Sparkling Springs in Danville.

In the 19 years he worked as a salesman, he remains the only person at United Laboratories to sell $1 million in one year.

Vernon devoted his life to his children and wife. He was the greatest father possible to his three children, Ann Button (Jim), Brooks Fonner, and Vernon J (V.J.) Fonner. He was the most loving, patient, and caring husband to his wife, Misty Fonner.

Our hearts are broken, but we remember him by the jokes that he would tell throughout the day; this was one of his favorites.

“The Fly Above the Lake”

There’s a fly 6 inches above the lake. A fish spots that fly thinks to himself, if that fly drops 6 inches he could leap out the water and catch that fly.

There’s a bear. He spots that fly and thinks to himself, if that fly drops 6 inches, a fish will leap out of the water to get the fly and he can reach out and grab the fish.

There a hunter across the lake eating a cheese sandwich. The hunter spots that fly and thinks to himself, if that fly drops 6 inches, a fish is going to leap out of the water, and the bear can reach out to grab the fish and the hunter can shoot the bear.

There a mouse behind the hunter. The mouse spots that fly and thinks to himself, if that fly drops 6 inches, a fish will leap out of the water, a bear will reach out to grab the fish and the hunter will get up to shoot the bear and drop the cheese sandwich, and the mouse can go after the cheese sandwich.

There’s a cat behind the mouse. The cat that spots the fly thinks to himself, if that fly drops 6 inches, the fish will leap out of the water, the bear will reach out to grab the fish and the hunter will get up to shoot the bear and drop the cheese sandwich, and the mouse will go after the cheese sandwich and the cat will go after the mouse.

So what happens?

The fly drops 6 inches, the fish leaps out of the water, the bear reaches out to grab the fish, the hunter gets up to shoot the bear and drops his cheese sandwich, the mouse goes after the cheese sandwich and the cat leaps to get the mouse, but misses and rolls into the water.

Now what’s the moral of the story?

If you have heard this joke and know the moral of the story, we invite you to join us for a celebration of Vernon B. Fonner’s life from 2-4 p.m. Sunday, Oct. 20, at Owens Funeral Home, 101 N. Elm, Champaign, IL 61820.


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